A Decade of Delight and Disappointment

10 years.  A decade.  So many years of marriage...  So short a time when you're in love...

Looking back over the last ten years, I see mostly sunshine and roses with just enough rain and thorns to make us appreciate the warmth and sweetness. Chronologically, I would characterize our first decade in this way:

Delight #1:  After many years of singleness, finally marrying the man of my dreams and experiencing God's gracious goodness in the delight of our love.  Our marriage has been the "exceeding abundant" answer to my every prayer and has surpassed my wildest expectations.

Disappointment #1:  Realizing in the second year of our marriage that conceiving a child would be difficult for us.  Battling infertility has been the cloud in the otherwise sunny sky for most of the first decade of our marriage.  But through it all, we have found solace in one another and in the sovereignty of our God.  I often think of Elkanah's words to Hannah in 1 Samuel chapter one, and silently answer his question to his wife "Am I not better to you than ten sons?"  with a firm "yes" as applies to the gift God has given me in Conroy.

Delight #2: The blessing of our miracle from heaven, our own Jacie Nevaeh, born in the fourth year of our marriage when we had just about given up hoping for biological children.  She has been our gift that keeps giving as we delight in each stage of her development!

Disappointment #2:  Secondary infertility.  I mistakenly thought that after having one child, the "floodgates would open" and more children would come easily.  Not so.  Prayers and tears and more doctors' visits have proved me wrong.  But the same truths that held me during my years of singleness and then during the first few years of infertility have held me and have been my stay and comfort. I'm reminded once again to keep my hands open in surrender to the One Who loves perfectly and to relinquish my dreams as I allow Him to write my story.

Delight #3:  Ministering together.  "Two hearts, one dream."  We're in this life journey together.  Our calling unified.  There's no greater joy than serving the Lord, except for the joy of serving Him together.  He has replaced our dreams and expectations with His own, and we delight in discovering His unexpected plans for us.

So it is with the confident delight in our sovereign Lord's plans, that I eagerly anticipate the next decade (and more) of our marriage --  peering around the corner down the next corridor of the joyous adventure found in serving our Great and Worthy Savior together!

It Takes a Church....

Hillary Clinton famously said "It takes a village to raise a child."  As conservatives, we decry such a notion, loathing the idea of any secularized institution having a hand in shaping the heart, soul, and mind of our precious, impressionable children.  Unfortunately, I (and perhaps others) have assumed that the rightful opposite of that statement is that Christian parents are to bear the sole responsibility of raising their children.  God has been very creatively and deliberately showing me how wrong I am in that assumption.  

As a naturally independent person with specific beliefs and opinions on the rearing of my child, I have eagerly embraced the responsibility of raising my daughter in the fear and admonition of the Lord.  Conroy and I are intentional about regular Bible devotional time and prayer with our daughter. We expose her regularly and deliberately to children's Bible songs and Bible media.  Both Conroy and I were led to the Lord at our parents' knees.  Both of us were raised in pastors' homes and have Bible college degrees. So naturally, I assumed and expected that most likely we would be the ones to lead our daughter to the saving knowledge of Christ.

The church is dear to us and a regular part of our lives.  We firmly believe in the ministry of the local church and its important place in our daughter's live and in our lives.  But still, in my mind, I saw it as secondary to our home discipleship.  Then when Jacie was attending 2 &3 year old Sunday School, a shift occurred in my thinking.

In questioning her about her lesson after church as normal one Sunday, Jacie replied with the Gospel message -- the simple story of Jesus' death, burial, and resurrection to take the punishment for our sins.  For the first time, in her own words, I heard her articulate the Gospel.  Tears rushed to my eyes and the realization flooded through me that the faithfulness of her Sunday School teacher brought these eternal truths to bear on her conscience for the first time.

Fast forward to this year.  Jacie is 5, now approaching her 6th birthday next month.  My prayers for her salvation have intensified over the last year as I have seen her understanding grow and her knowledge deepen.  Also, I was saved at the age of 5 1/2 years, the truth dawning on me as the culmination of Bible teaching and exposure was ignited by the Holy Spirit in my heart .  So I had spent the year asking the Lord for the salvation of my daughter at an early age, as well.

Jacie attended kindergarten at our church's Christian school in the mornings for the last few months of school while I filled in at the high school in a long-term sub position.  I would pick her up in the late morning, and we would spend the rest of the day together -- either "homeschooling" or out and about.  One evening during our regular devotional time together, the topic of the children's Bible lesson we were reading related to salvation.  As I occasionally do, I asked Jacie if she had ever received Christ.  Usually her answers were evasive or she became silly and restless which I always took as the Holy Spirit's leading that she was not yet ready.  However, on this night, her answer was very serious and very specific.  She began to tell me how her kindergarten teacher at school presented the Gospel to the class during Bible time and encouraged them to pray to receive Christ if they hadn't already done so.  Jacie went on to share that she had prayed to receive Christ as her Savior in that moment.  I probed and questioned a little further as Jacie continued to express her understanding of the the Gospel and her faith in Christ.

The wonder hasn't left me yet.  God is so good to answer my specific prayer regarding Jacie coming to know Jesus as Savior at a young age!  Further, once again He sovereignly chose to use her Christian school teacher as the instrument of her salvation, once again, instead of her parents.

And so, I assert, with wonder and praise, that it takes the Church to raise a child in the fear and admonition of the Lord.  The body of Christ is meant to work together in sync for the procreation of the Kingdom.  How blessed are we to be a part of His body and how true it is that we are meant to need each other!