Life never happens as you expect on your wedding day. Infertility happens. Jobs change. Callings emerge. Even the person you marry changes over time. The one constant is God Himself. And, thankfully, the character of the man I married hasn't changed. Through life changes and disappointments, I've learned to trust in God more, but I've also learned that I can trust my husband. His character has shone steady and his commitment has been true. How grateful I am!
#5 - Where he leads, I (ought to) follow.
My husband's leadership is God given and conveys a wisdom I don't always immediately "get." Those times I have pushed ahead against Conroy's better judgement, the outcome has always come back to bite me. Not because Conroy holds it over me or does anything, but because time and circumstances prove him to be right. This lesson has recently come home to me and is one from which I'm determined to learn.
#6 - Even the best of marriages take work.
In our marriage, we can easily coast. Our personalities are quite compatible and we are both laid back people in a lot of ways. But when we coast too long, we drift apart. We need the occasional check-in of a one-on-one date night, of a healthy "state of the union" discussion, of intentional daily times together. Unfortunately, it usually ends up being a fight that precipitates the "healthy discussion." Our goal is to get to the place where these discussions take place out of an ongoing passion to keep our marriage strong and not just arising out of conflict.
#7 - Give each other plenty of space and room to grow.
One night in a discussion with one of our young adults after Bible study, I overheard my husband say that he does a lot of "overlooking" in our marriage. I didn't get offended. It's true. He does overlook my faults and chooses to love me anyway. In a good marriage. I believe both spouses get good at "overlooking" the faults of the other -- not in a "winking at sin" kind of way, but in a "love covers a multitude of sins" kind of way.
#8 - Reminisce and dream together.
I love to relive our romance and look forward to our future. Often our date nights consist of dreaming and setting goals for the future -- ministry goals, financial goals, and family goals. This was a key component to our connection while we were dating and the way we love to continue to relate. It keeps us connected and growing in the same direction. There's little else more bonding than making plans with someone and reviewing where you've been together.
8 years -- a mere drop in the bucket compared to so many -- I can't wait for the next 80 and beyond!
