For this Fridge I Have Longed....

Every time I look at my refrigerator door, my heart smiles.  No, not because of the refrigerator itself, nor because of what's inside it.

It's the outside that I love -- the outside covered with photos of friends and family, yes.  But especially the bottom half -- the Jacie-height part covered with random pieces of her handiwork ~~

scribbled crayon Sunday School papers, 

glued construction paper shapes, 

the requisite magnetic letters constantly changing in design and order at her whim. 

This is the fridge door I longed for so many times in those first four years of marriage while trying to get pregnant.  I wanted it so badly -- all of it -- the clutter, the chaos, the toys strewn in random places, the too-loud chatter of a toddler voice.

And now it's my life.  She's my life.

  

So while I still dream of more children, of the chatter of more than one little voice, I am thankful, so thankful that my prayer has been answered in my lively little girl.

That our house is not quiet.  

That the lower half of the refrigerator door is not bare. 

That my living room isn't grown-up neat like it was for so many years. 

I treasure the mess because it represents life -- one sweet little life much prayed for and much loved and too soon grown up.